Sometimes

Sometimes...
....i post on my blog when i should be doing homework.
....i wonder who's telling the truth.
....i wish i could be friends with a lot more people.
....i swear.
....i cry a lot.
....i live a very small life.
....i want to be safe and protected and fine.
....i want to live large and grow and breathe.
....i don't take care of things well.
....i'm too responsible.
....i'm competitive.
....i'm a writer and gardener and painter.
....i just want one home.
....i want to live through books, and not outside of them.
....i need bigger celebrations.
....i worry that i just won't cut it.
...i'm tired of trying to measure up.
....i punch out the sides of boxes and refuse to take what i've been given.
...i'm angry.
....i just don't get it.
Sometimes
....i'm good at fighting for myself.
....i really love like i'm supposed to.
....i think i understand, maybe, what God would have of me.
....i'm thankful for reminders.
...i hate following the rules.
....i hate it when everyone else follows the rules.
....it all seems so clear cut.
....my hopes are so small.
.....i don't want to suffer at all.
Sometimes, at the end of the day, I'm real thankful for a warm bed to crawl into.